Pitter Patter Tick Tock
by PichiKeen
Summary: You can be in love with her all you want, but if you don't pay attention and speak up, you'll miss out. Then what will you do? Cry? Because it's not all that effective. The rain will still fall and your broken heart will still beat.


And it hurt. It physically _hurt_ to see them together. Finn had suffered from jealousy before, but never like this. It was less anger and more…pain. He wouldn't admit it, but sometimes he'd let the tears roll down his face, only to be soaked up by his pillow.

Not that he would admit it. Because he didn't cry.

She didn't even notice. That was the worst part. She had no fucking clue just how much she meant to him. Because up until a few weeks ago, _he_ had no clue how much she meant to him. One day, he just woke up and noticed her.

Like for the first time.

She was flipping through some dusty old tome and he was playing his air guitar to the best of his abilities. They had bumped into each other. And something about the way her body had pressed against his, all soft and warm and flesh, made his mind come to a screeching halt.

"Sorry, Finn," she muttered, never looking up from the book.

He watched her walk away, guitar forgotten. It was then that he noticed just how…nice she looked. She walked with confidence and seemed to curve in all the right places.

He wanted her. He wanted her so bad. He _needed_ her. To be beneath him, next to him, or on top of him, he didn't care, he just needed her with him.

So he started to pay attention to her more.

He listened when she spoke and memorized the way her voice rose and fell. He watched her when she was in the room, captivated most by her subtle gestures. He cherished, God how he cherished, when she brushed against him because that's when his body ached for her and it felt _so __good_.

He burned for her, yearned for her, and yet all he could do was gawk and gaze.

She just had no idea.

And it drove him nuts.

So it was late one night when all he could do was stare at the ceiling and think about her sleeping in the room right down the hall that he decided to tell her. He rolled out of bed and softly treaded up to her door. But he froze.

Because someone was already in there with her.

A voice that spoke slow and soft. A voice that made her giggle in hushed tones. A voice that should have been his.

He didn't know what to do.

First he felt like a fool for thinking that even for a minute she would take a second look at him.

Second he felt like he had to get away because he was about to break down and cry right outside of her door and that just couldn't happen.

So he ran.

He booked it all the way to the hangar. He wasn't think at that point, he was just doing.

He pounded the button for the bay door to open and the wind whistled through the room. The weather was wet and fierce, but he didn't care. He started up his Skimmer and took off in the downpour. The pounding of the rain and his heart and his head stuffed his ears and muddled his brain.

All he could do was scream.

So he screamed into the night. He yelled over the wind and rain. He wailed over the lightning and thunder. He shouted and screamed until his lungs burned like fire and his throat was raw.

"I think I love you," He rasped out.

"Can you even hear me?" His face was so wet he couldn't tell tears from rain anymore. His nose was running, he just knew, and he let it run because, God damn it, it didn't matter anymore.

"I think I might've loved you since day one, but I just can't be sure anymore!" His voice cracked and the metallic taste of blood filled his mouth, "I can't be sure of _anything_ anymore!"

The wind blew and water blurred everything around him, so his closed his eyes and rubbed at his face.

Heart still pounding too hard and too fast, he made his way back to the Condor and landed. It was ridiculously quiet aboard the ship and Finn had to remind himself it was ridiculously early in the morning. So he sat there in the ridiculous silence and listened to the pitter patter of water slapping against the floor.

The storm had passed and everything had calmed down. The sun began to break over the horizon and through the clouds. The sky took on the pastels and paint of the early morning, nudging him to get up and move on.

He slid off his Skimmer and hit the floor with a squelch. He would get up in due time, but for now he would let the sun warm his face and dry his clothes.

Something in the pipes above ticked and tocked a steady beat while his heart pounded on.

******  
Here have some angsty Finn because I love the little dork that much.  
Um tragic love is tragic and I just vomited words on a page and called it done.  
Oh look there wasn't a major song influence this time. How surprising.


End file.
